Puppies Are a Menace to Society

Puppies are the worst.

They are cute. Cuddly. Full of energy. And they’ll do anything to grab your attention. They are the very definition of “Distraction Device” and that makes them dangerous. Puppies must be banned. They must be silenced. They must be made invisible. Otherwise, everyone’s just going to be distracted all the time and nobody will get any work done. And that will be the end…of everything! Stop the darn distractors. No more puppies!

Here’s proof:

Mr. Kertes is an English teacher in Prince Rupert, in the territory of the Ts’msyen, at Charles Hays Secondary School - home of the Rainmakers.